Baby Beetle

Just yesterday, I saw a bug, actually it was a baby beetle, inside our bathroom. It was inside a bucket half-filled with water and it was just helplessly floating around there. I didn't notice it there until I was halfway through my bath. I moved the bucket away so that I wouldn't get any residue of soap and shampoo into it. I thought to myself: "If this beetle lives through 24 hours inside the bucket, I'd take it out and set it free."

The day after, sure enough, I saw it again still inside the bucket but this time it wasn't moving. I was filled with guilt and pity thinking that it was already dead but it turned out that it was only asleep. So, since I have resolved that I'd set it free, I took it out of the bucket and out of the bathroom. It was night-time then and the doors to the house were already locked. As I reached the front door trying to unlock it, it seemed that the beetle had other plans. Just before I was able to open the 3rd and last set of locks, the baby beetle flew away from my hands and it was gone. It was still inside the house though. Poor thing. If I was able to go out of the house with it, I would have released it somewhere in the midst our garden and it would've found lots of plants and food to eat. But now, since it flew away, I'd never know if it would survive. My best guess is that it would die of hunger since we don't keep plants inside the house.

As I went back to my room, I caught myself identifying with the beetle. I felt like I did the same thing that the beetle did. Very often, when I look for God's help, I sort of give Him a limit as to where He can help me. And when He reaches that limit or when His grace have come to a point where I feel like I can take over from there, I do take over and I usually try to finish the task using the best of my abilities. There are times that I've seen the results of my actions turning out well and there are also many other times that I've seen my actions contributing to my failure. I've been un-sensitive to the fact that when God plans something for you, He's planned for you the best. He's planned that you get to that garden among the plants and be happy. Instead, through most of my actions, what I've done is just fly away when things seem all right. I missed the blessings that I would've had if I only waited for Him and trusted Him enough on what He's doing.

Dependence on God doesn't show your weakness ... it shows how strong you really are.