Giving In To God
Marisa was a stubborn creature. As a child, when the neighborhood boys told
her to go away, telling her she could not play rough and tumble sports because
she was a girl, she was determined to prove them wrong. Prove them wrong she
did, and it was not long before Marisa gained a reputation of being a "Tomboy,"
you know, the old fashioned phrase folks used long ago to describe a girl who
acted more like a boy.
Through adulthood, this stubborn, independent, and determined streak carried
Marisa through many a difficult situation in and out of the workforce, but
sadly, from a spiritual perspective, it was a thorn in Marisa's side as she
often struggled between God's will and her own.
Never was this so evident than when Marisa, now a longtime married woman, found
her self sitting in a counselor's office pouring out her soul when asked to tell
why her marriage was failing.
"When Adam and I first married, we were so happily in love, and boy, did it
show!" replied Marisa, her eyes seeming to twinkle in delight at reflecting back
on a better time. "I don't know how or why, but I just was no longer filled in
my marriage. There was an unexplainable emptiness that I wrongly presumed was
due to a dying love," she continued. "I would look at Adam, and no longer did my
heart pound with excitement. I wanted the passion, romance and thrill of love we
once had, and it seemed nowhere to be found." "How did you resolve that?" asked
the counselor.
Marisa replied, "Even though I knew through my Christian upbringing that I
should cleave to God, I took it upon myself to try to solve the matter in my own
ways, rather than God's ways."
"What happened then?" asked the marriage counselor.
"A path of personal and spiritual destruction. Of course, I didn't see that
then, but I see it all so clearly now," replied Marisa as she looked down to the
floor in shame.
"I did everything to fill that void; drinking, abuse of prescription drugs, got
involved in hobbies that pulled me further away from God, and what I'm most
embarrassed about, I had an affair."
"Did these resolutions help?" asked the counselor knowingly.
Marisa continued, "They only made matters worse. Much worse. Not only were they
temporary band-Aids, but they left me feeling emotionally, physically, and
spiritually ill. The guilt and shame I carried around soon became heavier than
my actual marriage problem, and that is why I finally dropped it, and why I am
now here."
What the woman in this story learned the hard way is that, in life, the roads we
are offered are very clear. There is the right way, and the wrong way. God's
path of righteousness, or own path which is typically filled with temporary
human resolutions that can never be as satisfying and fulfilling as the truth
and all-encompassing love of our Creator. What Marisa perceived as a lack of
love in her marriage, was actually just a marriage that needed a jolt of life
blood; the hard work of two people who need to make and create the intimacy
Marisa so missed in her relationship with Adam. Even greater than this need, was
Marisa's hunger to be fully loved and accepted in a way no mere human could
possibly do. Why? Because, as Marisa finally learned, this place in her being
was empty due to her own neglect of her spiritual relationship with God.
In time, Marisa and Adam began praying and playing together again as a family.
The dark cloud of shame that hung over Marisa's head from her destructive
behaviors was removed after she offered God her sincere repentance from her past
sins. For so long, Marisa had been fighting God and her marriage, and now it was
time to end the war.
As you read this message, can you think of ways in your own life that you are
not going down the path God wishes you to, but you are instead taking a detour
which will result in a dead end? Now is the time to follow Marisa's example, and
to know that God is not here to condemn you, but to love you.
Contributed by Melanie Schurr Copyright © 1998 Melanie Schurr Visit my personal
page at
http://www.angelfire.com/mi/melschurr