A mother heard the family cat yowl in pain. She
knew where to look – she looked for her son, Mike. "Stop pulling the cat's tail,
Michael!" She chided.
"I'm not pulling his tail," the boy retorted. "I'm
just standing on it. He's doing the pulling."
He, of course, is no different than any of us. Often,
our first impulse is to blame someone or something else for problems. It's the
cat's fault. Or the school's fault. Or my parents' fault.
I once heard a story of a 40-year-old woman who was
jogging in a U. S. state park when she was attacked and killed by a mountain
lion. Her family immediately filed suit against the state because of its
"failure to manage the mountain lion population" and because it didn't "react to
reports of cougar activity in the area by posting warning signs."
But an interesting thing happened. Her distraught
husband felt it was wrong to blame the state or anyone else for his wife's
death, even though he stood to possibly win a small fortune. Against her
family's wishes, he dropped the law suit. "Barbara and I have always taken
responsibility for our own actions," he explained. "Barbara chose to run in the
wild and, on a very long shot, she did not come back. This is not the fault of
the state, and people should take responsibility for themselves."
I would like to meet that man. He no doubt believes
that the Blame Game" is a no-win in the long run. He seems like a person who
would rather spend time fixing what's broken than fixing the blame for it on
someone else.
This isn't about law suits – it's more about whether
we are essentially victims of life or whether we are powerful and responsible
people. An important step in gaining mastery over your life is to resist the
urge to make something or someone else responsible. Like novelist J. K. Rowling
(of Harry Potter fame) said to graduating Harvard students, "There is an expiry
date on blaming your parents for steering you in the wrong direction; the moment
you are old enough to take the wheel, responsibility lies with you." Certainly
background and circumstances have influenced who we are, but who is responsible
for the person we become?
An important decision I made was to resist playing the
Blame Game. The day I realized that I am in charge of how I will approach
problems in my life, that things will turn out better or worse because of me and
nobody else, that was the day I knew I would be a happier and healthier person.
And that was the day I knew I could truly build a life that matters.
Steve Goodier
The Illustrator: This daily newsletter is dedicated to encouraging
everyone to look towards Jesus as the source of all the solutions to our
problems. It contains a daily inspirational story, a Bible verse and encouraging
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The Nugget: Published three times a week, this newsletter features inspirational devotionals and mini-sermons dedicated to drawing mankind closer to each other and to Christ.