This reminds me of another text: "No one can serve two masters. Either you will
hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise
the other. You cannot serve both God and money." (Matt 6:24, NIV2) However, here
it reminds us that living "according to the flesh" is in complete conflict with
God's Holy Spirit.
Truly living for the flesh will leave us wanting. Once swallowed by this vicious
monster there is no way out. Fleshly addiction will dominate us to the center of
our being. Still, there is hope. We can break these bounds of addiction if we
rely on our Father's Holy Spirit. He is the only one who can "put to death the
misdeeds of the body," which will clear the way for abundant living. Our job is
to hunger for our Father's Spirit and to despise this self-indicted prison. Let
me explain with an illustration by Bonnie Motes: The Testimony of a Drug Addict
who Could Not Die...
"I can remember wanting to die since I was eight years old. In fact, at no point
in my entire life up until just a little over a year ago, can I recall when I
had ever experienced what it was like to truly want to live.
Although I loved God as a little girl, almost everyone in my entire family had
battled severe drug-addiction and mental disorders. I believe I got the worst of
them all …
Almost two years ago, God used a man named Reid who has been living in the Texas
penitentiary as long as I have been alive -- to shine the light of Jesus on me.
This man only knew about me through my Aunt who talked to him about me
constantly and has never met me. And I would not even be thinking about him
today, if not for the miraculous …
One night, I had overdosed so severely that I felt my life leaving me. My heart
was racing out of my chest, and I began to black out. All of a sudden, I could
hear a group of people whom I had never met, praying for me, and could feel them
laying hands on me.
Immediately I came to, and my heart was beating normally, and I could breathe
again. The next morning, out of the blue, I felt like calling my Aunt in Texas,
whom I had not contacted in an extremely long time. For some odd reason, I felt
like I needed to ask her about Reid, her husband in prison. I most assuredly was
NOT going to tell her about the incident the night prier, because I wouldn't
want her to know about it.
But - the very first thing that came out of my mouth was to tell her about
everything I had experienced that night.
After I told her, she responded, "Bonnie, did you know that just yesterday, Reid
and all his prayer partners in prison were lifting you up together to God." I
started crying. It became clear to me immediately who these people were that had
interceded on my behalf that night … me being a complete stranger to them.
That's when I recalled something I had heard my Aunt say about Reid a long time
before. She told me one day, "Bonnie, Reid may be behind bars, but he is very
much a FREE man."
I remember asking myself, "HOW is this man FREE when he has been behind bars as
LONG as I've been ALIVE?!" (At that time about 33 years). "And WHY is it that I
have been in the FREE world my whole life, but have spent my entire life behind
BARS?"
This question made me start to think.
Just a few months later I had been looking at myself in the mirror. But instead
of seeing the outside reflection of "Bonnie", I could see the INSIDE reflection
of "Bonnie". I could NOT pass a mirror in the house without seeing myself for
what I really was. And I wanted to PUKE and break all of the mirrors! I cried
out loud to God while hating myself for what I had become. "Oh my GOD! Is THAT
what I look like?!!"
At that moment, a thought was quickened to my mind. At the time, I didn't even
realize that it was actually God who brought this forth to me. I remembered this
bogus resume that I had written some time before, while I had been extremely
high on amphetamines. I had titled the resume: "Go-getter". I spoke to God, and
said, "Hey God! Remember that resume that I had written a while back? The girl I
portrayed myself as on that resume actually cared about other people more than
herself, was self-motivated, inspired, creative, pleasant to be around, and a
leader. And she was a GO-GETTER. I am NOTHING like that girl, Lord. And who
WOULDN'T hire someone like her? She would have been an asset to any company, not
a liability. God, can you make me HER? Is it POSSIBLE?"
Not long after that, I still had quite a few "pressing" problems. I had been
tormented by the stronghold of major drug addiction for many years. I had lived
as a prisoner inside my own mind for so many years that no matter HOW many
rehabs I attended or HOW long I stayed "dry", the "stronghold" was always still
there.
Well … eventually, I began to sink into a new level of low and complete despair,
even for me. So I made a passionate and desperate plea to God in the privacy of
my own room. I told Him that if I had to get THAT low, to get THAT much lower, I
was going to commit suicide. And THIS time, I would succeed. I could not take
living that way any longer.
I screamed at God with my fist drawn, "There is NO rehab strong enough for me
and there is NO rehab long enough! And I am NOT willing to go back!" I even went
so far as to give God an ultimatum. And this was on a Tuesday, mind you. I
challenged Him. "You have until Friday to deliver me and to tell me what my
purpose is on earth. Otherwise, I am exiting stage left, and You can NOT hold me
against my will any longer!"
Immediately, I took a giant leap of faith and cried out to the Lord in complete
desperation. "If you say Your Word cannot lie, and that you died for these
things years ago, then all I should have to do is tell You that I do not want it
anymore, and it should be gone yesterday! So guess what? I DON'T WANT IT!!!
And my face streaming with tears … I lifted my addiction up to Him in the spirit
and ALLOWED Him take it off of me. I knew at that very instant that the
stronghold had been shattered!
Still … I had the problem of "mental" disorders. The truth was that I had been
so severely afflicted with demonic spirits that NO anti-psychotic pill in the
entire history of medicine has ever been invented that could have cured me from
it. I remember it had gotten so bad that I went from being termed "bi-polar" to
"borderline personality" to "schizophrenic" to "multiple personalities". It had
reached to the severity that I could be talking with someone and I would ask
them what their name was, and they would reply, "Bonnie, don't you remember me
at all? I'm "so and so", I talked to you for three solid hours just a couple
days ago. You don't remember?"
The truth was scary. NO, I did NOT remember. It was as if "Bonnie" hadn't been
present at all.
I even thought that perhaps I had blasphemed the Holy Ghost because I would
literally run from praise and worship music if I heard it playing anywhere. It
would make me cringe. In fact, I remember saying one day, "Those ******
Christians! I HATE them!"
I refused to even leave the house anymore, because I knew something was wrong
with me, and I knew for a fact that if I was to be around anyone for any length
of time at all, they would know it to. This is when I made another passionate
plea to God. "What do I do, Lord?! Get this spirit of suicide and depression OFF
of me!
And this is what He told me to do… "Praise Me! Because the devil can NOT stand
in the praises of God!" But it was not just a quick "praise God." I had to
praise God for almost two DAYS solid! Just when I would begin to feel it lift, I
would start crying, and sink again.
I told my mom, "I'm not going to make it!" She said to me, "Make it through ONE
more night, and God is going to lift it off of you in the morning."
I cried myself to sleep, but I chose to trust my mother, that she had heard the
voice of God. And the next morning when I awoke, the very first song I put on
was the song "Our God" by Chris Tomlin. This was the song I had hated to listen
to the most. But when I put it on and sang the very first verse, the spirit of
suicide and depression completely vanished. I knew that they were gone, because
I could hear my OWN thoughts, and I could hear GOD! And I KNEW … that I was
going to be okay. I KNEW at that moment that I would not be waking up again with
suicidal thoughts, depression, thoughts of murder, or any such thing! GOD IS
PHENOMINAL!
I said to God, "There is NO way to repay You, Lord. But I would like to try!
WHAT can I do for YOU?" And, He told me … I am doing it NOW. In fact, He did not
stop speaking to me for three days!
What God took away from me, He replaced with something better!
All the chains that had held me captive for so long have been shattered! And the
prison doors flew open, and I was set free! PRAISE THE LORD!! And you know what?
I LOVE being free!!! That is what my SAVIOR, JESUS CHRIST did for me!! And He
CAN and WILL do it for YOU if you will ALLOW him to. JESUS is the ONLY one
strong enough!!
May God's face shine upon any darkness in your life, and may He reveal Himself
in great and mighty ways to you that you have never deemed possible, as you
begin to seek Him with ALL of your heart! HE is worth it, and so are YOU,
because HE SAID SO!"
Written by Bonnie Motes Thanks to
http://www.precious-testimonies.com/general/f-j/heindex.htm
Rob Chaffart
The Illustrator: This daily newsletter is dedicated to encouraging
everyone to look towards Jesus as the source of all the solutions to our
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