After I had been a Christian approximately seven years, I served on the staff
for a church which stressed the importance of exercising faith to receive God's
blessings. By contrast, in my personal life I was crying out with a deep desire
to know God for who He was as opposed to what He could do for me. God began to
introduce me to holiness and the crucified life, concepts that were nearly
foreign to me.
Back then I was an avid fan of the Dallas Cowboys. Every Sunday during football
season I came home from church and turned on the game. I waited to change out of
my suit during a commercial. If my wife needed help, forget it. "Honey, the
Cowboys are playing!" We ate lunch at halftime or after the game.
On one particular Sunday there was a crucial game. The Dallas cowboys were
playing the Philadelphia Eagles. The winner would earn a seat in the playoffs;
the loser would he eliminated.
The game was exciting, with only eight minutes left. The Cowboys were behind by
four points, but they had the ball and were on the move. I kept thinking,
They're going to (rive the ball clown the field and win this game in the last
few minutes like they've done many times before. I was on my feet in my living
room along with the crowd in the stadium.
All of a Sudden the Spirit of God entreated me to pray! The burden was
tremendous. I knew it wasn't something to which I could respond later. It was
for now!
I pleaded, "Lord, there are only eight minutes left in the game. Wait and I'll
pray five hours when this game is over." How could eight minutes .hurt anything,
I reasoned. Surely I can pray about whatever He wants me to after this game. But
the urgency and burden did not lift; it became stronger.
I bargained again, "Lord, I'll pray the rest of the day and even into the
evening if I have to. Just let me watch these last couple of minutes."
After all, I thought, I'm being generous! But the burden remained, and there was
a deep knowing within that my negotiations had been denied.
I comforted myself with what I thought was a fair compromise. I'll pray for
hours. Surely nothing could happen in the next few minutes that couldn't be
covered in five hours of prayer. I knew it was a compromise I could keep because
the rest of my day was free.
So, do you know what I did? I watched the rest of the game. When it was over I
immediately marched off to my bedroom and locked the door behind me. I got down
on my face, prepared to pray for a minimum of five hours. I meant what I had
promised.
For fifteen minutes I wrestled and tried to pray, but it was a struggle. It was
as dry and boring as any prayer could be. The urgency and ability to pray was
gone. The burden had lifted. I knew I had been wrong. Conviction overwhelmed me.
God showed me that what I wanted had taken greater importance than what He
desired. After several minutes of dry silence, God spoke, "Son, I don't want
your five hours of sacrifice. I want obedience!"
These words riveted me. I lay speechless before a holy God. How could I have
been so deceived as to count the eight minutes trivial when God was calling me
then. How could I have treated His desire and will so lightly! I had chosen a
carnal football game over obeying God...
Returning to my example of the Dallas Cowboy's football game, I had been a
Christian for quite awhile. I served diligently in full-time ministry, often
fifty to seventy hours a week and at Sunday services. I was often the last one
to leave the building. Having done all this, when the Spirit of God came upon me
to pray, I felt I could ignore His calling voice because, after all, I was His
faithful, hardworking servant.
So by my unspoken attitude I was asserting to God that I had the right to pick
and choose When I would listen to and obey His voice. It was optional because I
was so loyal and hardworking. We must remember that a thousand acts of obedience
do not justify one act of disobedience!
That I could have been so ignorant and arrogant now makes me want to weep. Jesus
gave His very life for me, and I smugly judged His leading as optional because
of my menial works! May God keep us from the subtle deception that leads to
disobedience!
Bevere, John. The Devil’s Door. Lake Nary, Fl: Charisma House, 1996, p.
35-37,48. With permission,
www.charismahouse.com.
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