The Power of Kind Words
A recent topic on the Oprah show had a simple concept that left me wondering
why, since it is so obviously positive, more people aren't practicing the art of
passing along kind words.
On this particular show, Oprah was completely taken off guard when a woman from
her childhood made a surprise appearance. Clearly it was an emotional moment for
the queen of television who explained, through tears, how this woman's kind
words, of long ago, greatly impacted her life.
As Oprah tells it, she was about 8 years old when this woman, whom she had never
met, looked at her and said: "You are as cute as a speckled pup." Though Oprah
really wasn't quite know what she meant, she knew it was a compliment and that
single remark helped to empower an otherwise timorous child to begin to believe
in herself.
The phenomenally successful Oprah Winfrey stood on the stage of her enormously
popular talk show with this lady, tears streaming down her face as the emotional
impact of four decades ago still holds meaning that causes a stirring in her
soul.
Kind words have the power to inspire lives, yet I wonder how often people
realize that they hold the key to impacting the lives of others by creating
kindness.
I was a gangly adolescent, awkward, terribly self-conscious and painfully shy.
By age fourteen nothing much had changed. Back then a friend of mine had an
older sister who, by all our accounts, was hip and cool. She had a hearty laugh
and an outgoing personality that blended easily in the popular social circles.
She was well liked among her peers. As long as its been I can still remember the
light blue eye shadow she always wore, a color that brought out the beauty of
her pale blue eyes. She was fun loving and not at all afraid to be herself.
One day I heard her say something to my friend that had a positive effect in my
gawky young life. I'll never know if she said it intentionally, for me to hear,
but she asked who I was and then made the comment that she thought I was pretty.
That was about the kindest thing I've ever heard anyone say about me.
At the time my puffy round cheeks and oversized lips, that were not in vogue at
that time, gave me reason to be withdrawn and self-conscious. And, it's not that
this compliment automatically changed my life or caused me to win any popularity
contests because it didn't. But what it did was help the fragile ego of a young,
insecure teen-ager to look in the mirror without an ugly duckling frame of mind.
My friend's sister also pierced my ears that year. With a tiny pearl decorating
each ear lobe, I slowly emerged from my elf imposed shell of self doubt. Kind
words can replace feelings of low self-esteem with self assurance.
Uplifting comments can give someone that extra nudge to see past their
shortcomings to reach for the endless limit of starry skies.
The people speaking the kind words probably won't even remember them in years to
come. But the recipient will remember it always. Overdosing on being nice should
be a mindful indulgence for the kind at heart. Like love, kindness grows, the
more you give the more you have to share. Just think of the positive power you
possess when you arm yourself with kind words. Imagine the benefits of helping
someone's self-esteem blossom like the petals of a flower, gently unfolding in
its own potential beauty.
I don't remember the lady's name whose kind words helped to change the way Oprah
saw herself at such a young age. But, I do remember that long ago teen-ager
whose unexpected compliment helped me to see myself as more than homely and
inept. Her name is Rita and her kind words have never been forgotten.
Kathy Whirity kathywhirity@yahoo.com